pushing through the mountain

mountainsexhausted.

stressed.

anxious.

overwhelmed.

can’t breathe.

no end in sight.

Ever felt that way?

That is how I have felt the last two weeks. The last two weeks were an accumulation of the start of this year… normal work and immediate family responsibilities, but add to that, a serious family illness with death as the final outcome requiring out-of-state travel to the memorial service and the search, purchase, move-in, and furnishing of a new home… and assignments for two MA classes to top it off!

My professors basically gave me these last two weeks to catch up on the semester’s work because I had fallen so far behind. Otherwise, we were looking at dropping the classes or taking an extension into the summer… neither of those sounded like a good option to me!

As a StrengthsFinder identified “Achiever”, I did not want to settle for less than pushing through the mountain and getting to the other side… where rest and tranquility awaited me (I can dream, can’t I?).

However, as I pushed hard – hours with my nose in the books, more hours on the computer, turning down invitations to fun events, ignoring the piles all around my new house, sleeping 4-5 hours a night, getting impatient with my husband… I began to resent the effort.

I began to question why I really cared. I began to doubt my ability to get through the mountain.

Have you ever been there? Have you wanted to give up?

Tonight I am celebrating… and reappearing here🙂 because I have read the three books and 15 scholarly articles and written the three papers that put me… officially caught up with my MA work! The piles are still on the floor. My husband has been gracious and forgiving. I feel tired still. But for now, we will celebrate a few moments of freedom! And I will surely sleep well tonight – maybe for even a few extra hours.

Sometimes the mountains do seem insurmountable. Sometimes they stand in front of us for many more than two weeks. Sometimes it is appropriate to give up the climb, or go around, or find a different path. This time I just pushed hard, and I got through. I am grateful.

What mountains are you facing? How do you take on the mountains in your life?

8 thoughts on “pushing through the mountain

  1. Pushing through is good….sometimes. As you said, I think “why” I push through instead of go around or stop the “climb” is important. Too often MY pushing is to prove something or find significance in “finishing the climb”….not a good reason! You have had a huge mountain of circumstances lately! Been praying for you!

    • You are a wise woman, Alice. So important to consider “why” we are working so hard to push through and finish the climb. Sometimes sitting down to rest and enjoy the flowers in the best thing we can do. Thanks for your prayers… and love! Love you back!

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